We Need an Obama ! of our own !

I find myself pretty impressed with Barack Obama ! I hope he wins ,mainly because I believe he'll do us better than McCain would ( Us = Arabs ,Palestinians ) , I've been following the elections since the primaries ,and I'm impressed with this man's achievement .I find myself defending him sometimes if the election issue came up when talking to friends !I made sure to wake up on time to watch his nomination acceptance speech at the DNC live couple of days ago !!! but then i thought : why da hell am i so excited about Obama !!! I also watched his speech at AIPAC ,it wasn't something cheerful at all ,I mean I'm not American,I don't really care about what kind of tax cuts and health program he is going to enforce there !! I care about whats his plan regarding Israel and the middle east !!! and i thought about for long time ,i generally like to analyze feelings,why did i have this feeling and not that,why did someone act this way not otherwise ,so eventually i figured , its not that I like Obama himself as a candidate to the USA president as much as i like what he represents ,a man who had tough life growing up, made his way through life ,a middle class who knows how hard it is to get food,education and health for the mass majority of his people ,who is now a step away from leading his country ,apparently not forgetting where he came from,and putting his country and his people 1st ,wanting to help them have a better life ! I thought : we -Arabs- need an Obama of our own !!we need this kind of a leader ! Someone who'd help the poor,fix the economy,create new jobs ,honestly and truly put the people's interests 1st !! of course all of our leaders,elected or not,claim that these are their top priorities and all that crap we hear from each and everyone of them,where the reality says otherwise ( do you disagree ? read the newspapers ) .

His speech of hope and change and "getting our country back" at the DNC reminded me of Jamal Abd El-Naser's speech on nationalizing the Suez Canal !!! I think this explains the excitement in the Arab world about Obama !! i think that we're hoping that he'd be a "good" president ,fair and just ! because his background and all...

But the reality is,nations doesn't move forward with the help of other nations ! nations grow and prosper on their own,change must come from within ! ..whats your thought?

You x365

x365 is a real lovely idea,started in 2006 when :

Dan Waber turned 40 on January 12th, 2006, and wanted to mark the occasion in some positive fashion. So he got this crazy idea (not an unusual event) to write 40 words (no more, no less) every day for a year, and each day he'd write about a different person (in no particular order) who touched his life. But not just anyone, it has to be someone he's actually met in person, someone whose name he still remembers.

and its been all over the place ever since ! i came across MommaBean's 365 blog n i find the idea delightful ! I just started my x365 blog ! and honestly ,maybe this is the only time where i felt that i wanted to be older so badly so i could write more ! heck ! 23 :/ well in September I'll be 24 I'll have an extra word :)

Go to x365.org home page and check it out. and start your own if you like the idea !

How i got lost today and ended up listening to Amr Diab in Bangkok!

August 27th ,2008
Yesterday I went over a friend's house to sleep over , i live somewhere around the red triangle on the upper part of the map ( right click -> open in new tab! i just love drawing maps ?:d) my friend's place is where the big red start * at the bottom,between "Ekamai" and "Thong Lo" Sky-Train stations (the sky train route is in green,the underground train -metro- is is blue) . and i never been to that area before,its just too far away from me and i have no business going there . today morning ,around 11 am when i headed home ,my friend gave me the directions to the two near-by Sky Train stations (the short red line on the map) it was something like : right,left,right,straight,right ,keep straight ! easy !! it was supposed to be 10 minutes walk maximum !after walking nearly 20 minutes ,i figured,something must be wrong !where da hell are the stations ?!!! luckily ,i saw a tourist coming my way ,finally,someone who speaks English !!well from his accent i think he is from Spain or wherever ,he didn't speak English, we just mimed and i made the train sound "choo choo " and for some reason i made the arm move that goes with "choo choo" (circular motion on the side !!! LOL ,Kinder garden stuff sticks in your mind after all !!!!!) he got what i was talking about and somehow i understood i should take the next left and keep straight all the way ! it was a bloody hot day today ,i walked for 40 minutes ,and eventually i saw the sign of the UNDERGROUND train !!! i couldn't believe my eyes ,the nearest underground train is "Sukumvit"! i thought WOW,i walked some good distance !! for my surprise ,it wasn't even Sukumvit !! it was the NEXT station !! "patchaburi" ( marked with red rectangle on the map) apparently ,instead of taking the short red line,i took a wrong turn and walked the blue line ! it felt funny to get lost anyway,wasn't that bad !

so to reward myself on this awfully long walk ,i thought I'd take a snack, or a drink in a nearby big ass Mega Mall ,so i went in, i enjoy the big malls here very much ! for one thing, i let myself visualize what kind of big store i want to have - I'm planning my life in advance - ,and they're really really big there is everything you could think of in these places ,Mecca Mall in Jordan is a joke comparing to them !one thing that gets my attention in the malls here generally ,is that Thai people LOVE to play computer games,and they enjoy much the kind of games i find very boring , which is those picture-matching games,you know when you click the two similar pictures ?and there is like 200 little pictures on the screen ? those are in every mall in Thailand -nearly- and you'd find two adults playing together,a mom and daughter,two friends,bf gf, a little boy and his dad ... and they seem really excited and enjoying their time :d its delightful to watch - ezzZzZzZzZ this is a cultural shock - ,so i eventually found a nice big restaurant ,i walked around and found something I could eat,the restaurant was international ,all kinds of food ,i sat down waiting for my order ,there were a group of foreigners next to me,Thai people on the other side, everyone is shattering ,and i drifted somewhere in my head ,you know when the world is moving in every direction all around you and you just go somewhere in your head ? i kinda "woke up" when i found myself mumbling a song for Amr Diab !!! weird ! i hate his guts !to realize,that the song is being played in the restaurant !!!!!! it was "Habibi wala 3ala bali" or "wala 3ala balo" I'm not sure,that one with the fast beat n all ! and holly molly did i love Amr Diab today !! it was a blast !i was so happy ,an Arabic song!! n i looked aorund and everyone was busy doing wutever they were doing and talking and I'm thinking "HE3 HE3 HE3 HE3 I can understand that :D"
i enjoyed every bit of the song,i didn't touch my food until it was done and the next track started ,its a mixed CD or something there was no more Arabic songs in there,i had my lunch and allll the tiredness of the walk was gone.it just made my day .I'll allow myself to like Amr Diab to the rest of the day ,starting tomorrow I'm back to hating his guts :/.

Honoring my father III - هوامش

هوامش

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جلسا على الشرفة في السادسة صباحاً، النسيم البارد وانعكاس اشتعال الشمس على البناية المقابلة أخذهما الى صباحات الوطن، العصافير لا تغرد بهذا الشكل هناك! لكن أحدهما لم يكسر سكون اللحظة بهذا التعليق. فضّلا التحديق في محيطهما واسترجاع ما أمكن استرجاعه من طعم لون الصباح هناك ورائحة صوت غليان القهوه، التي باتت جاهزة للتقديم.

سكب فنجان والده أولاً، ما زال متمسكاً بتلك التفاصيل الصغيرة التي تمنح الهوية الحقيقيه، تلك التي تمنحنا خصوصية ما نحن، شعب نشرب القهوة في الصباح ولا نكترث إن كانت مضرة بالصحة. وضع الفنجان برفق على حافة الشرفه الضيقة، نظر في عينَيّ والده بفرح، هذا أول لقاء لهما كراشِدَين! اليوم يشربان القهوه ويدخنان معاً! اليوم تتحقق الأمنيه، رجُلان! لا أبٌ وطفل.

فكّر... سأخبره أولاً عن من تبقّى من أصدقاءه في الوطن، وكيف يستحضرون وجوده من خلال طباعي وتصرفاتي، لكن بعد أن يرشف قليلا من القهوة أولاً، تلك الفترة بين التحديق في الفنجان والرشفة الأولى لا يجب أن تقاطع لأي سبب كان. ثم سأخبره عن أصدقائي أنا! لا لا ! سأخبره عن أخي الصغير أولاً! يجب أن أريه أنني واع وأستطيع التعامل مع المواقف الصعبه والمهمه بقدر من النضوج. أخي الصغير سيكون مثالاً جيداً.

سكب فنجاناً لنفسه وجلس بجانبه. حدقا في الأفق، صوت فنجان القهوة في رحلة الصعود الى الفم وعودته الى صحنه تماشت مع المحيط بسلاسه، لم يكن صوتاً فظاً على الإطلاق.

وجد لصوته فسحة وانطلق: أتعلم؟ لقد التقيت بصديقك الكاتب في عمّان قبل فترة وجيزة في مقهى عمون، لم يعرفني للوهلة الأولى، أنا ما زلت أذكره مذ كنت صغيراً، كأن ملامحه لم تتغير أبداً! الرجال بعد سن معينة يتوقفون عن النمو، أما النساء يكبرن، ينضجن! وكان معي ديوان شعر! آه نسيت أن أخبرك، لقد حضرت حفل توقيع كتاب محمود درويش! أخيراً التقيته، في المرة القادمة سأطلب نسخة موقعة لك أيضاً... ندمت وأنا قادم في الطائرة لأنني لم أطلب نسخة موقعة باسمك، ندمت على أشياء كثيرة أجّلتها مراراً، رحلة الثمان ساعات كانت كافية لمراجعة أحداث أربع سنوات.

لم ينتظر رداً، فهويعرف والده جيداً، هو لا يجيد فن تبادل الكلام لمجرد الحديث فقط! كان يعرف أنه يجب أن يستفزه، أو أن يثير إعجابه بشئ ما، تابع حديثه بشيء من الفخر: بالمناسبة، صديقك كان سعيداً بصحبتي! تحدثنا في مواضيع سياسية! نعم! آه نسيت أن أخبرك أيضاً، أنا الآن ناضج سياسياً، مارست الكثير من النشاطات في الجامعة، تعرّفت على صديق جديد بطريقة عجيبة بعد سفرك مباشرة ،اسمه مثل اسمي، ووالده وأنت رفاق منذ زمن بعيد، نضجنا معاً كما نضجتما معاً! أتذكر حين كنتُ في الثامنة من العمر وأردتُ الذهاب معك وأمي الى "مظاهرة جبل الحسين"؟ حينها أخبرتني أنه يمكنني فعل ذلك في الجامعة.. أتذكر؟ على أية حال سأعترف لك بأمر؛ في تلك المرة وددت الذهاب لأرى كيف ترش الشرطة المتظاهرين بالماء! أردت رؤية سيارة الإطفاء عن قرب لا أكثر.

مد له سيجارة بعد هذه المقدمة، شعر أنه بدأ يحتل مكانته كرجل واع لا يخجل من الاعتراف بحقيقة نواياه، ابتسم له ووضعها بجانب فنجان قهوته الذي ما زال ينتظر إقلاع رحلة الرشفة الأولى.

تساءل لماذا لم يأخذ أي رشفة للآن! ألا يحبها مرّة؟ أنا لا أحبها مرة أيضاً! اعتقدت أنها ستترك انطباعاً جيداً! أنا لا أشرب القهوة أساساً! ربما لا يحب سجائري الخفيفة هذه! يجب أن أستبدلها بنوع آخر لونه أحمر! أم أنني تحدثت كثيراً؟ ربما يجب أن أتروّى في طريقة كلامي، أنا لست شاباً طائشاً مندفعاً، تمتم لنفسه.

سنأكل اليوم سمكاً مشوياً! أتذكر عندما وعدتك بعشاء سمك مشوي في مكالمتنا الأخيرة؟ لا أدري لماذا كانت مكالمة طويلة جداً! فأنا لم أخطط لأن أفاجئك بزيارتي هذه بهذا الشكل في حينها!

لم يرد عليه أيضاً! لكنه تفحص وجه ابنه جيداً! تغيّر كثيراً مذ فارقه قبل أربع سنوات ونصف. لكن شعر وجهه المتفرّق ما زال مبعثراً ومضحكاً كما كان في بداية نموه... أصبح الآن جزءه المفضل من وجهه. حرّك فنجانه لليسار قليلاً، ترقّب أن يبادله والده كلمة واحدة! لكنه لم يفعل! بل اتكأ على الكرسي براحة أكبر، عقد يديه خلف رأسه وأخذ يحدق في شعر وجهه بتمعن أكبر.

 ربما هومضطرب للقائي المفاجئ هذا؟! كان يجب أن أخبره بقدومي! أم أنه لا يريد أن أراه في هذا الظرف! غرفته الصغيرة هذه لا تدل على وضع مادي مريح! أيعقل أنه ما زال يبحث عن نجاح أخر ولا يريد أن يراني قبل أن يحققه؟ ألهذا لم يأخذ إجازة واحدة للزيارة طوال هذا الوقت؟ أليست هذه طباع المحاربين على أيّة حال؟ سأحمله على الحديث بأي شكل كان، قرّر.

تصنّع العفوية وقال: أوه لوتعلم، لدي صديقات كثر! محبوب أنا بين أصدقائي خاصة الفتيات منهم! ابتسم بخجل وأحس بالغباء لوهلة! ليس هكذا يحمله على الكلام! تدارك الموقف بسرعة وسأله: أخبرني كيف كانت النساء في شبابك؟ كيف التقيت بأمي؟ كيف قلت لها أحبك؟ أين كنتما تخرجان؟ أمي قالت لي أنكما اعتدتما الذهاب لمطعم القدس في وسط البلد! وسط البلد؟ تأخذ أمي لوسط البلد يا رجل؟! هل كان قدومي للدنيا مخططاً له أم أنني كنت نتاج صدفة وحادث عرضي؟ لقد أجريت حساباتي بدقة، وتبعاً لتاريخ ولادتي وفترة حمل أمي بي، لا بد أنني بدأت التكوّن في رحمها ليلة رأس السنة! أوليلة الميلاد المجيد! أنا متأكد! ليست صدفة أن اليومان في ذالك العام كانا يومي خميس ها!؟ تزوجتما يافعَين، لماذا؟ هل كان قراراً طائشاً؟ هل كنتَ شاباً طائشاً؟ ربما فكرتما أنكما ستريان أحفادكما وأنتما لا تزالان بصحة جيدة؟ هل توقعت أن يكون لك أحفاد في سنك هذه؟ عليك الانتظار بضعة أعوام، لا تبدأ أرجوك، دع عنك حديث الزواج، أرجوك! ماذا عن باقي إخوتي؟ أخبرني كل شئ كل شئ، نحن الآن مثل الأصدقاء.

أمطره بهذه الأسئلة واحداً تلو الآخر دون توقف، تماماً كما كان يلقيها على نفسه أمام المرآة يوماً بعد يوم مذ سافر والده حتى تلك اللحظة المنشودة، لم يحرك والده ساكناً، ما زال يتفحص وجهه ويراقب لغة جسده ويداه اللائي يأبين السكون عندما يتحدث.

أخذ نفساً عميقاً وبدا مضطرباً، حاول أن يراجع ما قاله علّه يفهم سبب صمت والده، اعتقد أنه لربما تجاوز خطاً أحمراً! ربما أغضبه! كل هذه الأفكار دارت في خلده! أحس بالغضب.. ليس هكذا تخيل هذه اللحظه في تأملاته الليلية، تخيلها مليئة بالحياه، بالضحك، بالسمك المشوي، بالسجائر، وحتى الكحول! كانت مشاركته والده كأس كحول على رأس قائمة أولوياته، لم يأبه لملاحظات صديقه المتكررة حول هذه النقطة بالذات، فهو يعتقد أنه ثائر بطبيعته، ثائر على أي شئ وكل شئ، وشرب الكحول مع والده ليس إلاّ شيء يفعله صديقان ويضرب بعرض الحائط كل المحاذير التي يعتبرها "متخلّفة". لا يدري لماذا يجد في نفسه حاجة ملحّة لأن يثبت لوالده أنه الآن ند له بأي طريقة كانت.

بردت القهوة في مكانها ولم يشرب منهما شيئاً. الشمس ارتفعت والحرارة أصبحت مزعجة، دعاه للجلوس في الداخل، فتح له باب الشرفه الزجاجي ودعاه للدخول قبله.. وقفا للحظة صامتين، كل منهما ينتظر الآخر ليقول شيئاً، بادر كالعادة وقفز وفتح حقيبة سفره، نثر الكتب التي أحضرها معه على الأرض، تنقّل بينها بسرعة ملخصاً محتوى كل منها مبدياً ملاحظاته، أخبره كيف أنه قرأ أحد كتبه من مكتبته القديمة التي انتهت محتوياتها في العلية الرطبة، وكيف ضحك كثيراً عند قراءته للملاحظات التي تركها على الهوامش، ملاحظات عمرها عشرون عاماً أوأكثر، وكيف كان يرد بدوره على ملاحظاته على الهامش الاخر للصفحة. ملاحظات تحولت إلى رسائل، رسائل تحولت كتباً في كتاب. فتح إحدى تلك الكتب وقام يريه أين انتهى نقاش الهوامش هذا في أحد كتب الدكتورة نوال السعداوي، كان نقاشاً هامشياً ثلاثي المحاور هذه المرة، أمّه أيضاً كان لها تعليقاتها الأكثر إضحاكاً على ذلك الكتاب بالتحديد: "ملخص: كل الرجال كلاب؟". لكن جرس الباب قاطع حديثه بفظاظة! نظر لساعته، إنها السابعة، لا بد أنه صديق والده المقرب في الغربة، كعادته دقيق في مواعيده! فتح له الباب وعيناه ملأى بقطرات تنتظر إذن الخروج. دخل الرجل الغرفة، نظر للكتب المتناثرة على الأرض، رأى الفنجانَين والسيجارة، استرق نظرة على الكتاب الذي كان بيده، قرأ بعضاً من الهوامش. مسح دمعته التي انسلّت على وجنته أخيراً، احتضنه بقوّة ...

 اليوم نزور قبره، لا تحزن.

http://naserz.blogspot.com

Honoring my father II

following Tawjeehi ,my dad as many Palestinian youngsters involved into resistance movements , long story short, he flee for dear life to Jordan ,and was not allowed to ever go back ,with a literary Tawjihi certificate and 5 JD he started his life in Jordan,he worked in The Intercontinental hotel dry clean service at 1st ,when they interviewed him,he made up all stories about his experience in hotels ! he eventually got the job ,phase I : survive ,accomplished . he was not 18 years at the time . then he saw an vacancy ad in the newspaper for a teller position in Cairo Amman Bank ! - can you imagine :d bank jobs where in the newspapers back then - ,they interviewed him,gave him a math exam ,and of course,he got the job ,he was hell of a speaker ,interviews were never hard for him. and so he worked in the bank,listed himself in the the General Union of the employees in Banks,Insurance & Auditing in Jordan ,and of course the communist party ! until this day,he is the youngest to be registered in the union at age 18 .he believed in the role of labor and community institutions as a key player in developing out country .
The man ranked higher in his work ,the bank,the union,and the party,he also served as a volunteer in the Jordanian civil guard as an ambulance driver ! he just loved helping out whatever way possible .i remember going with him once to the civil station ,and i asked him on the way back home,i was 5 or 6, i asked him,"so why are you in the army of Jordan not the Palestinian one" he said : "son,Jordan is our country as much as Palestine is,if you love Palestine you must love Jordan,don't you love Hallool -thats my sister- ?" i said yes i do !he said ,Jordan and Palestine are like you an Hallool . thats the kind of man he was !! I'm really really appreciative of being his son .
he eventually ended up the manager of one of the banks branches for 5 years,and the chairman of the union for two years ,before he quit to start a small free business here in Thailand "for us" ! I know that its normal for a son to be impressed with his father,but thinking about it,coming from no where,to be a bank manager,the head of a labors union ! I only wish to leave such legacy that makes my beloved ones proud of me as he did !
He taught me to be brave,respect people,especially my mom and sister,women in general ,people of other religions and ethnics !he never tried to push us to believe in what he believed ,on the contrary ,in Ramadan ,he would wake up at 3 am to make us S7oor ! there was a phase in my life when i was about 12 years old,where i committed to praying the 5 prayers at the mosque,all 5 of them, you'd think an atheist communist father would forbid such thing !? he used to drop me off at Fajer prayer,wait for me outside,and bring me back home ! when i used to memorize Quraan for school contests,he would set there and make sure that I'm well prepared ,of course i never thought about these things while i was young,because it was taken for granted,but when you grow up and see what kind of close minded oppressing world we live in,you start to appreciate such acts ! thats my father !
I didn't see him for the past 5 years ! unfortunately ,he didn't see me growing up to be a man,but,thx to the internet and phone calls !he got it,and if there is something thats giving me strength when thinking of his tragic departure,alone and far away,is his words,that he is proud of me ,and that I'm the man he always wanted me to be,independent, smart,and respectful ! I'm lucky people !if your parents still alive ,go talk to them,tell them that you love them ! thank them for a lot of things !i did !and his words are engraved in my head forever !no one or anything can change them now! trust me,once they're gone ,you're gonna remember every big and small conversation ,and you're going to regret much of what you never told them.
I have wrote a short story a while ago,I'll post it as the final segment of this series of posts.

DAD,i know you're there somewhere looking at me,probably smiling and your eyes are watering ,i know you;re happy for me ,I'm happy yea :) you're great !!i love you!!!!thank you.

Honoring my father

Ok i got an idea to make me feel better passing this AWESOME day . I'll remind myself what made my father so special ,this would definitely sound cleche but for the ones who know me,they know that people always tell me that I'm unique and one of a kind - you have to know me to verify :d - and since i was a kid whenever someone praised me I'd tell them من شابه أباه فما ظلم ! so here it goes, if you're in mood for some personal one of a kind stories stick here .because he was indeed interesting !

I'd say that my favorite thing about my dad was his open mindedness yet sticking to his origins and never compromise on his beliefs .he was a Marxist communist who respected everyone and always knew what he wanted ,since he was young in Palestine - Al Samou3 (some pics ,video of grandma baking traditional bread) he was rebellious and independent ,one "funny" story i was told about him when i visited Palestine - and later asked him about it :D- is that in the village ,like in any village ,stories about ghost and Genes is every where ,and my dad never believed those stories, and he got himself in an infamous argument with the Imam of the village's mosque ,and of course,all the elder men sided with the Imam and my dad ended up being the bad teen ager who needs to be disciplined etc... . so what did he do later that evening ? he calls a friend and persuade him to help him get even with the elder people !he thought,okay,you insist there is a gene in the village,I'm gonna give you a gene ! so later at night,they head to the cemetery with big plastic pipes ,and they started blowing air in them ,and you know the voice that'd come out, they stayed until mid night and head back home,the next day,few people started talking about the gene in the cometary !bingo !they kept on doing that for about a week !and of course people were afraid to even look out the window to check it out,until the elder men decided to group all together and go check it out, the unlucky young man didn't know about the plan, and he head to the cometary with his friend, they loved the controversy they made !!! and there they were, some 15 men with sticks !!!! - off topic,what were they thinking bringing sticks to a gene fight lol- ,and they were caught red handed ! the sticks of course came in handy ,and they both had hell of a beat ,but as he told me when i asked him about it " yea they beat the hell out of us,turned out a pregnant woman almost lost her baby because of us! it was immature to do so, but i made my point " . i love that story ! :)
he graduated from high school,like 99% of people in that era,studying on the light of a candle ,etc ,we know all those stories nothing special :p but in addition my dad was a shepherd ! that i like about him i don't know why !and he planted three trees that are big and tall now where he used to take the sheep ! i love those trees !thinking about it,everyone should plant a tree ,good idea,next time I'm in Palestine I'm gonna plant a tree.

How to deal with death ?

I was a bit in  shock when i realized that today (Aug 23rd) marks one year since my father's departure ! I was shocked and still am because I thought that after a year people kind of "move on", if not "forget"!! or at least they become familiar with the idea, accept it, or embrace it! which didn't happen, yet...!
It's as if for the past year, I chose to run away from confronting the fact in my head every time it came nagging! I tried grasping it, get done with it, more than once, and the result wasn't pretty! wtf ! I find myself weak against this, which doesn't happen often, and i never admit that I'm weak regarding almost anything ! I'd just tell myself that I'm not and I always beat things in my head.. but this one is just too fucking different !
I still have all his stuff ,didn't "Get rid" of anything ! clothes, shoes, ashtrays ,lighters, pens, books, socks, cups, medicine, wallet, razors ,shampoo, cell phone, broken charger, glasses... I even kept the food that could be preserved, the spices, Nescafe jar, beans, wutever i could keep as it is !
I don't get it! when do people over come this? how do you accept the idea ? how long should it take? It seems like i will never! frankly, I don't want to either! I still speak of him in the present tense, I refuse to refer to him as "the deceased" or "El mar7oom", call me wutever you wish I don't care, and don't give me "ma betjooz 3al mayyet '3air el ra7meh" lecture, you do that.
Its frustrating .
But there is a "good?" side of it I guess, whenever I'm out of answers or feeling down, this what I do, I just visualize and Imagine that he is here, and we'd talk, of course when I visit his grave its more intimate, and I don't know how but it works, I feel good afterwards.. eh... but the idea is bugging me !what do i do with all the stuff ?what is supposed to happen to them ? how do people move on ? do they ever move on ? geez this sucks.

shout out to Jordan's underground music bands : Oriental and Brutal Death Metal!

Talent in our Arab world is generally wasted,unless you're really lucky ,because in order to nurture a talent you have to find 1st,and that usually is the parents part if its going to happen at an early age,but when more than half of the Arab world is under the poverty lines, the parents aren't really focused on your talent,and that worry about making it to the end of the month shifts to the children some way or another and so the children themselvs don't pay attention to their talents.which is really sad.there are other reasons for why talent is wasted in our Arab world,but i believe the previous is the most important one.

However,some catches the train sooner or later, and they work on their talent and emerge,in Jordan,I've witnessed more than one example of such talents becoming professional or semi/professional ,This is a shout out to 3 of them ,two oriental ,1 Brutal Death Metal .

1) Sho Hal Eyam شو هالإيام
I'm not sure of the line up,so i won't mention them one by name,and I'm not sure if they're still playing or what ! I've watched them once in the Royal Cultural Center in Amman and they're awesome, if you know Ziad Rahbani's "sho hal eyyam" song then you might have guessed what kind of music/songs do they play, Shiekh Emam,Moh'd Moneer,Ziad Rahbani,Marcel,etc... . and they added a twist of rock to it,which i liked very much .i found this article in Al Ghad news paper about'em , and i have couple of tracks by them n i have no idea where i got them from too! here they are :

• Jeet Ahebbak
• Yasar - Original
• Walet Kteer
• Bala Ma Nsammy
• Tango - Original
• Yaba La

2) Sharq, شرق

need i to say this is the second oriental band ? :d
I love this band,they're amazing,they plays some covers and they have few original songs/music pieces so far,this is their facebook page,and here is some of their tracks from a live concert

• Baina Bain بين بين- Original
• 3ala 6areeq 3etat على طريق عيتات
• el 5at da 5ate - الخط ده خطي ( الشيخ امام - كلمات أحمد فؤاد نجم )0
• Ela 3amer الى عامر - Original
• Yamo - يامو
• Kamaqaber el shohada2 - كمقابر الشهداء ( شعر محمود درويش) 0 - Original

you be the judge .

3) TYRANT THRONE - Brutal Death Metal Band

yes i also do like this kind of music,not my favorite though ! i never get the lyrics, i enjoy the music itself,caution : could be described by some as "noisy" .so think twice before listening to them ,but being in Jordan and keep trying and eventually come up with a demo CD and some covers with such musical taste isn't easy,so they deserve appreciation at least .
this is their facebook page ,and this is the official website http://www.tyrantthrone.com/,they have an upcoming event check it out.

whether you like'em or not,i think a bit of appreciation at least won't harm,after all,we all know how hard it is to do such thing in Jordan,these people gave and still giving this much of their time,and if we - the young people - didn't support each other then who will !?

if you know about another band please tell us about it .and i hope you like the ones i posted .

سجل! أنا جاهل

إهداء : الى كل الذين سممو هذا الصباح بتعليقاتهم
الى كل الذين لا يرون في درويش إلا أنه "كافر"
الى كل الذين لا يرون أبعد من أنوفهم..سجل


سجل! أنا جاهل
ورقم بطاقتي مليون
و أطفالي مثلي جاهلون
لا أرى من الدفتر إلا سطرا واحدا
و أطفالي مثلي لا يرون
فهل نغضب ؟

سجل ! أنا جاهل
أنا فم مردد
أنا أذن لا تسمع
أنا عقل معطل
فهل نغضب ؟

سجل !
أنا جاهل
أنا أعمى
أنا أحمق
فهل نغضب ؟

سجل
أنا لا أشرب القهوه
و لا أعرف الحصان
أنا أكره اللوز
سجل. أنا لست أحمد

مع خالص كرهي
ناصر

Farwell Darweesh..البقاء للوطن

رحيل الشاعر الفلسطيني محمود درويش إثر عملية جراحية بأميركا

الخبر في صحيفة الغد

نفدت الكلمات مني يا درويش...نفدت الكلمات

هزمتكَ يا موتُ الفنونُ جميعها هزمتك يا موت الأغاني في بلاد الرافدين. مسلّة المصريّ، مقبرة الفراعنة، النقوش على حجارة معبد. هزمتك وانتصرتْ، وأفلتَ من كمائنك الخلودُ...
فاصنعْ بنا، واصنعْ بنفسك ما تريدُ

محمود درويش

Amman Underground Jabal Amman - Balad Tour

my

my favorite places in old Amman .
this started as me trying to give direction to a friend to Jafra cafe' down town ,i found myself adding most of my favorite places in Jabal Amman and some from Down Town ,i wish i could add to it Lwaibdeh area but this one took long time so :/) so here is a map ,and read this for explanations I'll explain all the letter n stuff :

you could reach down town from many places,i chose 1st and 3rd circle.i think everyone knows how ot reach there,if you don't just ask anyone in the street they'd tell you its easy :

start from the top of the map (right to left) :
1st circle, go straight you'll be in "Rainbow Street" i tried drawing Rainbow colors on the street but i have no clue wut are rainbow colors!!anyway,so there u'll find "the British council" right after it "Abo EL Dahab Center" there you can play bowling ,billiard ,it has a nice view up there,if you're in you're 20s then your parents probably had took you there long ago to something were called "عالم التسليه" with a big Panda hung on the building. opposite to Abo El Dahab there is a small Falafel place "Al Quds" one of the oldest in Amman,its very famous for it's delicious sandwiches,if you haven't been there once and had your sandwich on the deck next to it on the side walk then you missed on a lot ,you should try it.

if you're following on the map,there is a left turn (its gonna be a downhill way) ,but before we go on to the left,lets keep straight,you'll pass Rainbow street (they made some construction there the street is no more asphalt neither its comfortable to be on either in a car or walking,they ruined it :/) anyway keep straight and the road will start to go downhill ,to the right,find "R n B" for a good snack ,marked (1) on the map .

keep going down don't worry you're not lost,spot (Batata) to the right with its big orange sign,its the best fried batata in Amman TRY IT with different dips,they offer some 10 different dips i think ,and please try having it either in the cozy place there or on the side walk ,side walk is a must in Jabal Amman experience.

before u reach Batata ,to the left there will be a narrow street (marked 3) thats where Jara Market is held every Friday in summer time,click here for more on Jara market.

now keep straight (main road downhill )and take the 1st right,keept stright there will be an uphill narrow streets,thats where the RCC (Royal Film Commission) is (market 5 on the map) .

if u didn't go uphill and kept straight,couple of meters and you'll be at Books@cafe (marked 4),one of my fav in Amman it has a library down stairs,interent connection,and a cafe upstairs, if you don't like to go places where alcohol is served and might be couple of gays around then don't go there,otherwise you're gonna love the view .

notice at the end in gray (on the map) -DARAJ TWEEL- ,that stairs takes u down to wasat el balad, I've came up and down that stairs many times when i wanted to meet friends there and were broke :DDD so if u r tafran enjoy the walk :D.

lets go back now to Falafel Al Quds , as explained on the map, take the 1st left downhill, if you went to the left form the intersection you'll find "Wild Jordan" it has an amazing view,smoking is prohibited (or was at least when they 1st opened it),menu is all healthy and herbal stuff,the view is really amazing from there,down town Amman and Lwaibdeh opposite to u.

back to the map : if u took the right turn then the 1st left turn ,you'll find Al Balad Theater ,a lot of events are held there,concerts,poetry, book signing,...if you're into art,poetry ,etc, its good to know where it is, next to it there are "stairs سلالم" - lol @ salalem - those are long narrow stairs would take you down town,park somewhere close to masra7 el balad and take it down,Jafra cafe will be to your left hand side,look up for its wooden balcony you won't miss it .

OR lets assume you don't wanna take the 1st cirlce tour (lol),lets go from 3rd circle to down town directly ,

as u can see on the map,coming from 2nd circle or where ever go from 3rd circle downhill alllll the way till you reach that traffic light,keep straight and it won't take you long to be at Jafra ,opposite to you is Ittesalat ,post office and Arab Kuwaity bank,park there if you can and look up for Jafra's balcony ,you'll see the stairs too,Jafra's entrance should look like a big garage ,take up the stairs (once u entered Jafra) and enjoy the wooden furniture ,nice music,art pieces for display,antiques for sale,a nice library where you can read there ( or give books you wanna donate to the library) ,traditional delicious fresh food ,argeeleh etc,the place is really nice people who go there are generally young university students ,guys n girls,families (don't expect children tho),its different i recommend it to everyone.

back to the map,go straight on (walking now leave the car where it is ) at the corner i marked (DVD) you'll notice lots of DVD places,go to the one right on the corner (Hammoudeh) thats my fav DVD place :D 99% of the movies they had worked fine with subs n stuff,and they're really cheap,and even if you're a girl don't be afraid no one bites there,actually lots of girls go DVD shopping there ,mrattab el eshe don't worry.

back to the map,keep straight on the same side walk and look for a narrow alley with tables and ppl having Hommos and Falfel,thaaaats the famous Hashim Restaurant ,you must have heard of it ! (side note : look up Elias Farkouh's complete work,look for a story called “Avo” ,its about an Armenian man called Avo who used to work at Hashim back in the days,I love that story) .

keep going straight after Hashim and cross the traffic light intersection (stay on the same side walk when u cross) and you'll notice a police hut next to it is a biggg old building with a big golden doors,thats the Arab Bank,(marked A on the map,now we're on that area i enlarged in the corner on the map) right next to Arab Bank there is Abo Ali Book Hut ,Kushk Abo 3ali (marked B),the famous book "store" ,its on TV all the time,if you talk about Amman's cultural life you must come across it somewhere in the discussion, the man is as nice as he appears on TV,get urself a book from there some years later you'd brag about it :D.

next to it is a small alley ,you'd probably notice people standing there eating something,ITS KNAFEH (wa3 beddy) ,its an old Habeebah place there,really small,the tradition is you get some and eat it outside ,again if you're talking with someone about their Amman memories they'd probably mention this Habeebah place. while u r having your knafeh outside,look up,you'll notice a balcony ,yes I'm taking you ther just finish you're knafeh, TYT.

finished yet? (after 5 mins I'm entertaining myself sho a3mal zhe2et w ana baktob w bardom :D) aywa, next to the hut and the alley is a small building that has two balconies,you've seen one of'em above the alley,the other one on the main street side,there should be a small wooden door (last i remember it was green) ,go up the stairs if it was opened,thats Diwan El Duke (ديوان الدوق) it is one of the oldest buildings in Amman,it was the location of the ministry of health back in the 1920's if I'm not mistaken,its owner Mr Bsharat is keeping it the way it was,its opened for all visitors for free,there is usually some kind of art gallery there,paintings,photography ,or if there was not,the place is worth looking at for the heck of it,once you go in they would usually greet you with some lemonade,if you're lucky and the owner was there while visiting,he'd happily explain to you about old Amman,traditions,and architecture of the buildings ,even if he wasn't ,ppl there are really nice,there are information leaflets in many languages,one time i was there and they ordered knafeh for us from Habeebah with this tool they used to use long ago,from the balcony :D they'd drop a rope thats attached to a tray and the Habeebah place would put the knafeh in there and you pull it up its really nice.

across Diwan El DUKE on the other side walk you'll notice a balcony with some plants on it and lots and lots of flags drawn on the walls,thats Balat El Rasheed Cafe',its the oldest cafe in Amman,a lot of people call it as "قهوة الأعلام" its nice but something happened to it ,there isn't much tourists visiting it and you'd notice lots of Egyptian workers there nowadays (nothing against them) but being there with family or big bunch of friends isn't as comfortable as in Jafra ,but no one will bite u there too be sure about that :D.

and thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaats a wrap.

i hope some of you would go there and enjoy it ,don't miss these places they're really nice ,inspiring and different,despite the traffic and the noise and the people filling the streets like ants ,you should try it and be willing to like it to love it.iiiiii love it and miss it much.I'd have posted some pics i took myself but they're all in Amman i don't have any here.
cheers.#